Friday, January 16, 2009

Hurrah and hooray, it's Friday today! All day as well until midnight and then it's into the weekend, woohoo!
Being unemployed these days I'm not sure why I get excited about weekends; after all, they're pretty much the same as any other day except that Casualty is on telly on Saturday and nowadays there's also Total Wipeout to look forward to*, but I still feel that weekends are 'special'.
Saturday is not a proper Saturday for me without an afternoon tea, and Sundays are just plain wrong unless a full roast dinner is involved at some point during the day. Twice if I'm very lucky.
This Saturday is going to be rather more fun than usual as I have a friend visiting me from 'Oop North' and he's asked me to show him around London so I have my comfy boots ready and the camera set to shiny in preparation.
I could have shown him around today, but it somehow feels not quite right and not as much fun as going out on a Saturday. Does that make sense to anyone else, or am I alone in my weirdness yet again? Does anybody else feel that weekends are still 'special' or has the 24/7, 'Open all Hours', 'Get It Now!' lifestyle we have nowadays taken the shine off what used to be 'Time Off' for many people?
Does anyone out there feel the same?

Anyhoos, as it's time for fun and frolics (In my opinion at any rate) I've decided to do a lazy post today and have a 'Tell us your favourite jokes' session, just for shits and giggles like.
I'll get the ball rolling with some of mine.

Q. Why do elephants paint their balls red?
A. So they can hide in cherry trees.
Q. What's the loudest noise in the jungle?
A. Monkeys picking cherries.
What's white and swings through trees at 20mph?
A. A fridge.

Q. What's blue and white and swings through trees at 20mph?
A. A fridge with a denim jacket on.
Q. What's blue and black and swings through trees at 20mph?
A. Tarzan after he's been hit by a fridge.

Q. How do you know if an elephant's been having it off in your back garden?
A. The grass is flat and the dustbin liners are missing.
Q. What do elephants use for tampons?
A. Sheep.

Q. What's big and noisy?
A. A hippo playing the drums.
Q. Why will computers never take over from newspapers?
A. Ever tried making an airplane out of a computer?
Q. What do you get if you cross an elephant with a mouse?
A. Very big holes in the skirting boards.

Q. What's black and white and goes up and down?
A. A Nun on a pogo stick.
Q. What's white and shoots across the sky at 1000mph?
A. The coming of the Lord.
Q. What's white and wriggles across the floor?
A. Come Dancing.
Q. How do you know if there's an elephant under your bed?
A. The ceiling is closer than usual.


Tag! Your turn! And I'm sure you can come up with loads of goodies, far better than mine!

ttfn, and I wish you all a happy, peaceful and fun-filled weekend.



*I do try to concentrate on the people falling into the mud and bouncing off the big balls without fantasizing about Richard Hammond, I really do.
But it is very difficult not to, what with the mud, water, big balls and so on.
*sigh* Maybe I need help...