Tuesday, November 25, 2008


When Misty was little she was forced to go to a most hated place called 'School'. This place of hardly any fun was run by bullies called 'Teachers' who told little Misty what and what not to do and despite many attempts on little Misty's behalf to abolish lessons such as Maths and replace them with extra playtime, such changes to the curriculum were not made.
There were however, a few lessons that little Misty did enjoy such as Art, History and most of all Drama and out of those, her favourite was Drama.
Little Misty loved getting the chance to pretend to be someone, something or somewhere else and those two whole hours a week always passed far too quickly for her.
One day the Drama teacher had an important announcement; there was to be a Drama competition and Little Misty's class was one of the classes to be entered. Other classes from other schools would be coming from other parts of the town and would all be competing at Little Misty's school.
Little Misty was over the moon as because of the competition, her class was given extra drama lessons in place of hateful things such as P.E and were also allowed to rehearse during lunchtimes in order to be the best they possibly could.
The theme of their 'production' was to be a mime about 'The Black Death' and after the first week, the teacher had got together their story and each child had their parts to do.
The rehearsal began, and slowly but surely the 'mime' began to come together. It was only to be a five minute or so piece and what the pupils had to do was pretend to play a game of 'catch', wherein if you missed a ball the first time you had to catch with your right hand only, then if you missed a second time you had to catch with your left, if a third you had to kneel down, and if you missed again you were out of the game.
Little Misty's part was to pretend to miss the ball and during the game make it clear that she was not at all well as she was to be the first victim of the plague and scare the rest of the children by dying.
The day's rehearsal began and slowly little Misty pretended to be more and more unwell, and by the time she was kneeling down and about to drop dead, she was looking extremely ill and swaying from side to side.
But suddenly the teacher called out 'Stop!' and the class turned to find out what was wrong.
To little Misty's astonishment the teacher came over to her and asked her if she was alright as she didn't look very well at all.
In a quiet voice little Misty explained that she was acting as the teacher had told her to do and as she'd been told to stop, thought she'd done something wrong. Instead, the teacher told her that she was doing fine, but that she'd become worried as little Misty looked so sick.
The teacher then carried on with the rehearsal for the day, and little Misty carried on with her job of literally 'corpsing' on stage.
Sadly, little Misty's class didn't win the competition, but little Misty had learnt a very effective way of getting out of her most hated classes such as 'Maths' and 'P.E'. After all, if she could fool the Drama teacher, the Phys. Ed. teacher was a doddle*.
Nowadays though, Big Misty doesn't have to pretend to be ill as she's falling apart at the seams, but then she doesn't have any more P.E classes to worry about.

*Insert Red Dwarf joke here.