Before any of you think I've totally lost the plot, I'd like to explain that the pome wot I'm posting today was 'made' using one of those Magnetic Poetry kits and the door of my fridge.
Anyway, I like it, which is why I've decided to share it with you, so I hope you like it as well.

Yon Winter Codpiece

Yon winter codpiece, like loathsome poison shall torment thee vile spot.
Methinks mischance dost seek thine saucy goblet.
Wicked, wanton, perilous belch, thou hath perchance slandered thy melancholy, bawdy bosom.
Jest drunkard, damn well question nothing!
I beseech you, woo herein discontent, though always sanctify vehemence.
Merry wilt idle ghost speak through knowing, lazy measure,
Vouchsafe vulgar breast doth dream foul fortune.
Mortal lover that curse bestow'st envy of yonder wench, hadst naught my mercy warrenteth.
Aye, farewell drunk peasant, make the trifle!
Therefore forswear seemly villain,
Lest night deceive dire death.


And for those of you who don't particularly like poetry, here's another picture of a kitteh.