Friday, February 22, 2008

Les Récompenses D'or De Muppet

I'm sure that everybody has at sometime in their lives thought 'Why the feck did I do something so brainless?'
I had one of those moments the other day. A couple of days previous to the event I managed to cut my left 'pointy finger' with a pair of scissors. It was unintentional and very painful, and not much fun when I started leaking claret all over my camera while taking clickage.
Anyways, I wrapped it up with a plaster to stop the blood-flow, and a couple of days later it was healed enough to go 'au naturel' once more.
I was on a bus with a friend when I caught the edge of the cut while rummaging through my bag. This action caused me pain and made me do a swear, and my friend asked what the matter was.
I replied that I'd attacked myself with sharp things and showed her the cut, explaining that at least I hoped I was on a learning curve and it would teach me not to do it again.
Then I noticed that we were approaching our stop, so I reached out to press the bell to alert the driver to stop.
I pressed the button with my left 'pointy finger' which caused the cut to re-open, more leakage of bodily fluids, and me to do quite a few more swears.
I think it's taught me a lesson. And it will probably be a while before I can show my face on that bus route too.

Apart from my story of supreme Muppetry, my favourite tale is that of a bloke on the Jeremy Kyle show. Said bloke was complaining that his girlfriend was out at all hours cheating on him, and he knew she was taking drugs as he could smell them on her clothes.
She replied that yes, she was taking drugs, but she wasn't cheating on him.
To which the bloke replied, 'Well you are cheating on me! If you're doing drugs, why don't you get them from me? You know I'm selling them!'
Apparently the old bill picked him up on his way out of the TV studio.

Have you done something that's worthy of a 'Golden Muppet Award' or do you want to tell the world about someone else who deserves one?
If so, you know where the comments box is.
Over to you, and here's wishing you all a lovely weekend!